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How to have a truly happy new year.

For the first time in years, I don’t remember my New Year’s resolution from January. Usually, I write it down in my journal or on a note I stick to my mirror. There’s been many of those dog-eared sticky notes from years past. The year of contentment. Speaking life. We passed pancakes across the breakfast table on January 1st this year. “What do you want from 2018?” I can’t remember my answer. I know what I didn’t want though. I didn’t want to walk into her office and share the parts of my life I’m inclined to hide. I didn’t want to Facetime her the day after she delivered her baby that never breathed. I didn’t want to spend four months wondering how I’d walk into her house on Christmas day and see her empty chair. I didn’t want to go on another first date that led nowhere. We sit across from each other in a little coffee shop in Colorado, picking at a charcuterie board. “When I think about all of the things I have left to go through,” her voice cracks....
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Equipped

I take a final look around my empty bedroom, making sure I didn’t forget anything. Then, we step outside and hop in the pick-up truck that has desks and bed posts precariously piled into it.

Just like that. How did I get to this stage?

We talked about it earlier that day as we ate her Colombian food in the kitchen, our boxes of belongings piled on the kitchen floor. We talked about entering unfamiliarity.

But also, how God is outside of time.

How He’s brought us to this day.

Because we now have everything He wants us to have before we move forward.

As I slide into the truck beside my parents, my heart is quiet.

I’m confident that I would not be in this moment if God had not already prepared me for the next one.

“Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will…” Hebrews 13:20-21



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