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How to have a truly happy new year.

For the first time in years, I don’t remember my New Year’s resolution from January. Usually, I write it down in my journal or on a note I stick to my mirror. There’s been many of those dog-eared sticky notes from years past. The year of contentment. Speaking life. We passed pancakes across the breakfast table on January 1st this year. “What do you want from 2018?” I can’t remember my answer. I know what I didn’t want though. I didn’t want to walk into her office and share the parts of my life I’m inclined to hide. I didn’t want to Facetime her the day after she delivered her baby that never breathed. I didn’t want to spend four months wondering how I’d walk into her house on Christmas day and see her empty chair. I didn’t want to go on another first date that led nowhere. We sit across from each other in a little coffee shop in Colorado, picking at a charcuterie board. “When I think about all of the things I have left to go through,” her voice cracks....
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The snow makes crunching noises on the sidewalk as I walk home, cars whizzing past. The cold air cuts through my three-year-old plaid coat and my shoulders tense to stop the shivering. I breathe deep, nose tingling, because it is pure pleasure to feel something.

I remember her typing out words the night before, around midnight, and honestly telling me that it was hard. I knew what she meant. We pray and we get distracted, we get tired, we get complacent. Then, it gets to this point where we give up and our souls numb to the Spirit; we wonder why Christianity does not always bring smiles and warm emotions. 

I know that the Truth is always the Truth. Jesus does ALWAYS bring joy. Even when we feel like our heart is dry and our soul is begging for water, He is still the same joy-giving Saviour. To know Someone, we have to want to know them. Do we really want to know Jesus? Stop, then, wherever you are, and whisper you're heart to Him. Don't fret about the words to say, just talk to Him. He'll lead us beside still waters and give us water for our parched souls.

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