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How to have a truly happy new year.

For the first time in years, I don’t remember my New Year’s resolution from January. Usually, I write it down in my journal or on a note I stick to my mirror. There’s been many of those dog-eared sticky notes from years past. The year of contentment. Speaking life. We passed pancakes across the breakfast table on January 1st this year. “What do you want from 2018?” I can’t remember my answer. I know what I didn’t want though. I didn’t want to walk into her office and share the parts of my life I’m inclined to hide. I didn’t want to Facetime her the day after she delivered her baby that never breathed. I didn’t want to spend four months wondering how I’d walk into her house on Christmas day and see her empty chair. I didn’t want to go on another first date that led nowhere. We sit across from each other in a little coffee shop in Colorado, picking at a charcuterie board. “When I think about all of the things I have left to go through,” her voice cracks....
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The Infamous Thief


A thin layer of dust begins to form on my running shoes as we weave through the crowd at the giant country fair. Dad and I furiously lick our melting ice cream cones and watch the passersby.

The little girl riding on her father’s shoulders, butterfly face paint. The teenage girls, giggling together and sneaking looks at the boy in the cowboy hat. The young couple holding hands.

I wish I was all of them. I waste two minutes of the day, imagining a different circumstance in which to enjoy it.

As I kick up Canadian dust four miles from my parent’s green-and-white farmhouse and two feet from a devoted father, discontentment quietly robs my opportunity for joy.

Until I wish to be right where I am with the ice cream dripping down my hand and Dad making a joke he’s made countless times before.

Because what if the secret to happiness is not being someone else somewhere else with somebody else? It's just being glad. Being glad with the life you've got in the time it's given with the people who share it. 

And what if gladness comes from knowing that God is the One who planned those three pieces and puts them together? 

I really don’t want this moment served with nostalgia ten years from now.

I want this moment while I’m in it.

“A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.” Proverbs 14:30

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