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How to have a truly happy new year.

For the first time in years, I don’t remember my New Year’s resolution from January. Usually, I write it down in my journal or on a note I stick to my mirror. There’s been many of those dog-eared sticky notes from years past. The year of contentment. Speaking life. We passed pancakes across the breakfast table on January 1st this year. “What do you want from 2018?” I can’t remember my answer. I know what I didn’t want though. I didn’t want to walk into her office and share the parts of my life I’m inclined to hide. I didn’t want to Facetime her the day after she delivered her baby that never breathed. I didn’t want to spend four months wondering how I’d walk into her house on Christmas day and see her empty chair. I didn’t want to go on another first date that led nowhere. We sit across from each other in a little coffee shop in Colorado, picking at a charcuterie board. “When I think about all of the things I have left to go through,” her voice cracks....
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Transitions

I sometimes forget how the moments slip away.

Until I’m packing the car with the things I’ve collected over four years of university.

Until I’m hugging him goodbye at 2AM as the rain hits the pavement and street lights glow yellowish.

I sometimes forget how the moments slip away.

Until change looms ahead and you can almost taste the seconds as they melt.

Like chocolate on the tip of your tongue.

Or when we sit on her bed together, eyes clouding, and we both realize we will never live across the hallway from each other again.

I wonder if I’ll ever get to the point in my life where I don’t stumble through transitions like they’re pot-holes on a gravel road.

We sit around chatting at three in the morning, eating pizza and telling stories. I listen to the rhythm of each of their voices, remembering previous times when they opened their lips to say something that altered my view of the world or gave me a clearer picture of God.

How the moments slip away.

All I know, when I wake on a Saturday morning, one day closer to the end of this season, is that I am rich.

Rich to know people I will miss so deeply.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” Ecclesiastes 3:1



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